Monday, March 26, 2007

A simple berrage of thoughts:)

         I chose , purple, today, for I'm a Spring addict :):):):):)

                      LIFE, to me, is , like Carol King sung, a Tapestry. It's astounding, when one feels, there are no other coloures, but pitch black, GOD begins the next row of irridescence!!

                I returned, a bit ago, from doing something, I NEVER thought possible! ONLY 4 , More teeth , to be extracted, from my upper jaw. I , finally have looked my fear, right in the face, and, in about 2 months, WILL be able to SMILE, with a FULL set of teeth. I'll be TOO sexy for myself:):):):)-

                  The doctor, I see, is from an organization, that takes patients with no money, HOWEVER- he is THE , Most Gentle Dr., and all around delightful person, Ya could imagine. Now, back in the day, when my Daddy took me to the expensive Drs., THEY HURT! GOD, has provided me , with one, I didn't have to sell my first born, to afford, and his work and mannerisms, are PRICELESS.

               I, believe, I mentioned, how , my son, Zakkary, was NOT doing well, and his adoptive mother, told me he was on the out, cried, and would NOT allow me to see him, once more. GOD, has turned the tables:)-   Zaks' health, has improved, greatly, and Linda, his mum, assures me, when the snow is gone, she WILL be bringing him, to Burger King, {2 blocks from my house } so that Ashley, Megan and I, may visit with him:0 I , literally, had to pinch myself, in utter AWE!  She , even allowed me to speak with him. And, as when ever he and I speak, we verbally shared our UNdieing LOVE for one another. I assure you, that little man, SHINES!!!!!!!!!!!

                  Spring, has sprung, and I dazzle at the thoughts oftending the garden/lawn/LIFE:). The girls are all squiggly, to git their hands in on it, TOO. Now, I have NO sense of , actual smell...BUT- I can sense it, wonderfully. It's , almost, magical.Darn, it IS magical.

                  The contrast, of my life, THEN, and, my life , NOW, is like the contrast between Black and White! Each day, unfolds more treasured beauty, that I could have EVER dreamed of. I, am contracting more wonderful friends, reasons, revelations, ETC.! For so long, I was a veritable crash and burn woman. I, still, continue, { periodically }to pinch myself, to make sure it's , actually REAL. I don't mind saying, with couthe, "I am quite proud of me." Wait, don't git me wrong...I'm not braggin'! I, simply in awe, that from a drug induced brat, such a flower , could GROW. I was , SO opinionated and belligerant, for too long, and, I have come FULL circle, in finding a woman, I just don't wish to flush! Skrew ACID!!!!!!   Reality, in finding such a profound treasure, is a TRIPP, money could NEVER buy.

               My daughters, are "Blossoming." Hold UP- I am SOOOOOOoo Not perfect!! But, they are like me little mirrors. Some times, I wish to throttle 'em! AND, THEN, with NO warning, their phase ceases, and they radiate with my better characteristics.  Perhaps, a certain statement, I recall making. Then, a complete turn around, from their usual selfcenteredness,     into a rare , Christian reaction, I didn't , AT ALL, thought they took note of. The evolution of them, prompts me , to take note, of my own. For SO long, I found NO elloquence in myself. AND, it still takes a bit of coaxing, of myself, to read things , and understand, I am NOT the same!! Thank GOD.

          I MUST interject, this transpiration, was NOT done , all by myself!!!!!!! It was brought on, by the loving , UNfinancial support of precious entities, other than 'lil 'ole me! GOD, is the first, I wish to list. The Trinity of, The Father, The SON, and The Holy Spirit. Accompanied by, my cousin/Mother , Gail/Stormie, Elissa, my BEST friend,Anna Young, my spiritual advisor/companion, Michael Hanlon, dear Friend, Pastor Betty, Connie, our Church connect/chariot, Ashley and Megan and Zakkary, my children and wisdom, Elton, Zakkarys' Daddy, and the love of my life, Anthony Paul Soloski, my beloved Angel, Char, an Angel of the long distance kind, whom rejuvinates me , EVERY day!  OHhhhh, the list goes ON, a bit.  However, these entities, would NOT have given me the time of day, years ago. They had patience, and Gratefully, saw in me, things, I could NEVER have , even taken the time to look at, lest find. But , the ONE , whom clings to my heart, MOST of all, RIGHT next to GOD, IS- Charles Philip Gerchov, my beloved father, whom laid his everything on the line for me. I, can FEEL his love, STILL , near and watching, from his residence, in Heaven. NONE of us, are perfect. It is written, "Judge NOT, lest thou be judged!"

              It does my heart/soul, GREAT solace and promise, to have these pages, to reveal my feelings. I, can only hope, that another, can benefit from all I share. Peace Be Unto...

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