THIS WAS JUST A BAD DREAM! IN VIRTUAL COLOUR-

IT WAS IS LIVING COLOUR!

      I WAS PARTYING WITH MY DAUGHTERS AND TWO FRIENDS CHILDREN AND THEM. THE MAN, KNOWING HOW I MISSED HAVING A COMPANION IN MY LIFE, MADE IT KNOWN TO ME, THAT HE HAD ALWAYS DESIRED ME. I, WHILST NIBBLING PILLS AND BEER, { TO KILL THE ACHE INSIDE,} RESPONDED TO HIM, HOW I YEARNED FOR HIM , SO.

           NEXT FRAME, WAS THE WIFE, TAKING THEIR CHILDREN AND MINE, TO THE STORE. UPON THEIR DEPARTURE, HE AND I BEGAN TO DELVE INTO EACHOTHER. NEXT THING I KNEW, WE WERE IN AN ADANDONED CAR IN THEIR YARD. ACCROSS THE FRONT SEAT, WE BEGAN TO DEVOUR EACHOTHER, AND , WHILE MY ARMS WERE DANGLING OUT THE WINDOW BEHIND ME, HE PROCEEDED TO MOVE HIS MOUTH  DOWN THE LENGTH OF MY TORSO, BURRYING HIS MOUTH INTO MY LOVE BOX, AND MAKING ME FEEL LIKE I FORGOT SOMEONE COULD!WE BOTH MOANED IN PLEASURE, AS HE FINISHED AND CAME BACK, FACE TO FACE WITH ME, PENETRATING ME , DEEPLY, TO WHERE I SCREAMED OUT MY  ORCHESTRATIONAL ORGASM.

          I / WE, BEGAN TO DRESS, WHEN I NOTICED THE BLOOD, SCREAMING RED, AND FACTITIOUSLY KIDDED, "HONEY, I THINK YA BROKE ME." HE GUIDED ME TO THE UPSTAIRS BATHROOM, AND TOLD ME THERE WAS PLENTY OF PROTECTION IN THE CLOSET.

            AS I WENT IN, AND CHECKED THE CLOSET, AND DESPITE THEIR POORNESS, SHE HAD 'EVERYTHING' , ALL NEAT AND TIDY, AS WOULD I HAVE HAD IN MY OWN CLOSET! EACH TIME, I TRIED TO REACH FOR WHAT I REQUIRED, I MESSED THINGS UP, FURTHER AND FURTHER. THE BLEEDING , WORSENED, AS I TOOK  MORE PILLS AND SLAMMED DOWN MORE BEER. BECAUSE MY SEARCH WAS NIL, THE BLOOD WAS ALL OVER MY FAVORITE PAIR OF 'LEVI' JEANS, SO I STOLE FROM HER LAUNDRY BASKET, HEARING MY CHILDREN AND THE REST , RETURN DOWN STAIRS, WITH MANY , MORE PEOPLE.   { UNBEKNOWNST TO ME, HE TOLD HER! } I , AFTER LOCATING A SLIM BIT OF PROTECTION, I DESCENDED THE STAIRS.

                   ALL, { INCLUDING OLD FRIENDS I HAVEN'T SEEN IN YEARS AND SOME, WHOM ARE PRECIOUS TO ME, TODAY, }WERE BEGINING TO PARTY . EVERYONES' CHILDREN AND MINE, WERE HAVING A BLAST, AND THE ADULTS WERE DOING THE SAME.

           AS THE TIME PRESSED ON, I FELT THE MEAGER PROTECTION, FAIL. I CLIMBED, FOR THE LAST TIME, TO REPLACE IT, BUT , THIS TIME, IT WAS FIRE ENGINE RED AND OUT OF CONTROL! AS I ENTERED THE CLOSET, THERE WERE MORE OF A SELECTION, OF PRODUCTS, YET, EACH TIME I REACHED FOR ONE, I MESSED THE ARRAY UP MORE, AND COULDN'T GRASP IT.

            {{ OH- BY THE WAY-WHILE I WAS NAKED WITH HIM, MY BODY WAS THE SAME, TRIM, SEXY FORM IT WAS Y-E-A-R-S AGO! }}

           AS I DESCENDED FOR THE LAST TIME, I WAS GREETED BY A HOARD OF POLICE OFFICERS, AS WELL AS GLARES FROM MY SUPPOSID 'FRIENDS' AND MY DAUGHTERS! I WAS C-O-M-P-L-E-T-E-L-Y, DISORIENTATED, AND HAD no DEFENSE! BLOOD, WAS ALL OVER ME, AS I WATCHED AND HEARD MY CHILDREN SCREAM IN DISAPPROVAL,. THE MAN, SIMPLY HUGGED HIS WIFE, AND TURNED AWAY. "YOU SAID YOU LOVED ME!" , I HOLLERED.HE WOULDN'T TURN AROUND. THEN, IS WHEN THE POLICEMEN, BEGAN TO CUFF AND QUESTION ME.

              "NO PROBLEM," I THOUGHT TO MYSELF. I CAN BLAME IT ON  LUNACY AND MENTAL ANGUISH.             GRANTED, AS I WAS CUFFED, MY LINE TO THE PILLS AND BEER, WERE CUT OFF. SO, MY MENTAL DEMISE PLAN, FLEW OUT THE WINDOW. THE BLOODY MESS, WORSENED, AND THE BERRAGE OF FACES, BEGAN TO WALK BY MYSELF, OFFERING A CIG OR A HAND OR A GLANCE OF DISGUST, WHILST I REMAINED IN A DUG TRENCH, BELOW THE FLOORS LEVEL. AT THE TOP OF THE STAIRS, I COULD SEE OTHERS LOOKING DOWN AND SPITTING, SAYING, "HOW COULD YOU. CARLY?" I CALLED OUT TO HIM, AS THE OFFICERS DRAGGED ME AWAY, SAYING,"WHAT ABOUT US?" HE N-E-V-E-R LOOKED BACK!

 

                      My eyes, popped open, as I gasped for breath. I ran for my cigarretes, and , to my computer. AND, here I sit, realising, that this dream, came from GOD. It was / IS a HORRIBLE thought. It is a reminder, of what can and WILL happen, if I ever go back to my old ways. It shows me to be Thank FULL, of what The LORD has Blessed me with, today.

             During the dream, I had feelings of emancipation, proper direction for the Children, level character of self, { up untill the blood } basicaly, I felt I had it going ON! However, I am , STILL, a frail, human being, easily broken, if one gets TOO full of ones' self! In the dream, it was acceptable to harbor those feelings and actions, with another womans' man?!  BULLSHIT!  LOOK, just how wrong I can be...

             This morning, I shall face this day, humbled! My breathing, has normaled, mostly. I've spoken to GOD, and assured HIM, I got the point, BUT- actions speak LOUDER than words.           I pray, I don't have another dream of this sort!   " Now , I lay me, down to sleep. i , PRAY, The LORD, my soul to keep. IF, I should die, afore I wake. I PRAY, The LORD, my soul to TAKE..."